Self Promotion And The Unfair Campaign

Self Promotion And The Unfair Campaign

by

R.E. Prindle

One Of The Great Minds Of The Ages

Mayor Don Ness up in Duluth, Minnesota has really started something with his Unfair Campaign calling on Aryans to denounce themselves as race bigots. He’s putting Duluth on the map. With any luck his success will bleed over to Superior, Wisconsin the twin port.

Duluth itself as of 2010 was 92.7% Aryan and a miniscule 1.6% African. Let us not kid ourselves this is a Black-White thing, the Indians and others don’t count. They are not involved.

So of a declining population of 86,265 people there are 1380 Africans in Duluth. Of these, perhaps 4 to 5 hundred should be in the school system at any one time. Of these perhaps a hundred should be in high school. But of course, according to graduation rates only 25 are. On a three year curriculum that means there are about eight Africans graduating in each class. These numbers are hardly enough to make a statistic, let alone grab the attention of Mayor Don. There are no votes worth counting here. The African in Duluth can safely be ignored. Of course 5000 of them voted for Obama in 2008 but, what’s new? So what is Don and Ellen’s interest.

Duluth being almost devoid of color one is compelled to ask why Mayor Don felt compelled to instigate such an evil program. One reason the Duluthi may be unaware of racial (Black) prejudice is because if it does exist it must be irrelevant.; there is no one to discriminate against, except other White people and if Duluth is anything like where I grew up there is a lot of that. If a company’s hiring is all Aryan , well, it’s because Duluth’s demographics left them no choice. It was either White or blight.

But Mayor Don having apparently nothing else to do, or if he did, didn’t want to do it, sat with feet on his desk in emulation of his hero Barry Obama, looking idly through the frosted windows wondering how he could make himself a national figure like fellow Minnesotan Charlie Lindbergh, or heck, even more recently the Hibbing folksinger, Little Bobby Dylan. Now those boys knew how to create a stir.

‘Well, race hatred is pretty big right now,’ he thought to himself, ‘maybe I could start a campaign to crack the shell of Whiteness, make me a few tasty omelets.’

He picked up his phone with the hotline to the YWCA, ‘Ellen,’ Mayor Don said, speaking to Ellen O’ Neill the Y director, ‘I got a way to go national, maybe make the Letterman Show and everything, be big news for a week or two and once we get rolling the money will come rolling in. Maybe I’ll even be able to succeed Barry in 2016. Look what happened for the conservative white bitch from Alaska and she was on the other side. If we work this right we could be on the way.’

‘What’s the plan, Don? This better be good.’

‘Run this past your windows, kid. It’s unfair to be White. Play on words, get it. What’s fair about being fair. You know, like blonde.. We’ll plaster Duluth with billboards that can’t be missed, strike a real blow for…for…freedom or whatever, anti-racism. Pretty good huh?’

‘It’s got possibilities, Don,’ Ellen said. ‘Let’s go.’

And go they went. The billboards and posters went up. Bingo! The attention centered on Duluth just exploded as ‘news of the campaign hit websites that cater to white supremacists and other racists.’ Well, yes indeed why wouldn’t such an outrageous Lenny Bruce idea get attention. I’m not sure what is meant by ‘other racists.’ It seems to me that White Supremacists covers the whole base but other racists could be people who don’t know they’re racist yet. I don’t know. It got my attention anyway but I didn’t send out any hate emails like the one Don and Ellen say they got that said: Die, scum, die.’ I think they could be putting us on. Dramatizing. Most of the hate mail I get only identifies me as a certifiable asshole of which I suppose an unkind inquirer might find a trifle bit of evidence.

Don and Ellen bemoaning the rampant racism in Duluth plaintively asked: ‘How is our community going to grow and prosper if such disparities exist?’

The evidence Don and Ellen is that Duluth is not going to grow whether it prospers or not. Since 1990 the population is down from 105 to 86 thousand and falling. I don’t think that has anything to do with being 92.7 % Aryan. I don’t think race has anything to do with it. My bet is that those Africans drop out of high school and get the hell out of Duluth faster than Bobby Dylan left Hibbing along with a very high percentage of Aryan graduates, but I could be wrong.

That big hole in the ground is the problem Don and Ellen. A hole is an empty depressed spot. Whatever iron was there is gone, probably exploded over Germany in WWII. It’s over unless you can make Duluth the Silicon Valley of the North. That’ll bring in a few East Indians to ease your racial guilt but probably not too many Africans.

Let’s face it, you may be looking at a wall of whiteness unless you two also get the hell out of town.

Life isn’t fair, Don and Ellen, even though you two are. (Play on words)

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